Anger

My son informed me that he is like me, he can not stay mad. One of his friends treated unkindly at lunch, he was angry at the time, but by the middle of his class after lunch he was over it. He kept thinking of ways this friend wasn't nice and all the things he had done to him so he could hold on to his anger. Still by the end of the class he was over it. He came home and took his frustration our on me, because he has "inherited" this ability from me. I have to chuckle because this is so far from the truth. He was in anger management classes by the time he was 6. Granted he doesn't see me become angry very often. This is an emotion I have removed, not because it is a bad one, but because I receive no benefit from it. I do feel it, however it isn't an emotion I latch on to. There are various emotional levels that lead up to anger so once I feel one of those emotions I know when to acknowledge and defuse. For me it usually begins with annoyed, than moves into frustration, once it hits frustration if I don't acknowledge it it turns into irritability, by the time I am irritated things get interesting. I notice I develop an eye twitch. This lets me know that I am storing it rather than acknowledging it. Once I notice the eye twitch and I haven't done anything to defuse it I will feel "anxious and bitchy" and begin to lash out. If I still haven't done anything to defuse it, my body has two lines of defenses before it becomes Angry. It shuts down (mentally) or I become exhausted (from all that storing). Interestedly enough though, this can all transpire in minutes or days. I release the anger I feel by growling. I know that sounds corny, but hay it works. Once I growl, I feel better and move on. There have been only three times in my life that I allowed anger to take complete hold. It scared the hell out of me, and those that witnessed it. Fortunately or unfortunately there is only one person still alive that has witnessed it, my husband. To give you a visual, the sense from Lord of the Rings: Fellowship, where the white elf talks about taking the ring and "all will bow to her and worship her" she looks completely possessed. Ya, that would be what I felt like. So, you see anger isn't something I like to feel. I honestly am proud that my son has learned that it isn't good to hold on to anger. Irritation and frustration are better motivators. If you are unsure about how you feel anger, I challenge you to learn.

I Surrender & Trust

Guidance for today is : Forgiveness, Triumphant, Peaceful