Courting

This is a phrase that I feel has lost its true meaning. Traditionally, it has been perceived that it is the role of a male to actively "court" or "woo" a female, thus encouraging her interest in him and her receptiveness to a relationship. What I would like to know is how come this stops after they are in a relationship. If we work that hard at the possibility of a relationship, how come we stop once we have it?

I hear time and time again that the reason spouses/girlfriends/boyfriends/ significant others look outside of the relationship is because "the chase is part of the excitement." They have come to believe that the relationship they are currently in is a sure thing were as the chase is opportunity. Yet, these same individuals seem confused as to why their spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/significant other leaves them. My comment is "I guess it wasn't as sure of a thing as you thought".

On the other side, I have individuals that have been married for 10, 15, 20 years tell me that their relationship has lost its spark and have become content and complacent with their relationship. Their excuse is "This is what happens when you have been married this long." I am here to tell you that, that is a load of crap. What is the real reason we allow our relationship to become content or complacent; We truly don't want to have to put forth the effort to "woo" or "court" our spouse. We to believe that our relationship is a "Sure thing" so why put forth the effort.

Now days we "date", this boggles my mind. It is believed that "dating" is the up to date word for "courting". For me it doesn't feel like the same word nor does it seem to have the same meaning. Say the two words and see which word resonates more with you. To me a "date" is something I have with a friend or a business associate. We do something together that doesn't require alot of interaction such as a movie, or shopping. Yes, we are spending time together, but not really putting anything of quality into it. If we do eat together it is at a fast food restaurant or a sit down place that doesn't encourage dowdling. We visit over our food and then move on. Either way how much can be exchanged in a noisy restaurant?

I honestly prefer being and doing the "courting". What does this mean? You actually plan something. Yep, I said plan. Does it have to have a specific date, nope. I am sure you have heard of random acts of kindness, my question to you is when was the last time you did this for whom ever you are in a relationship with? Here is a "courting" suggestion for you. The weather has been awesome today and it seems to be willing to hold out for the rest of the day. How about if you took time tonight as the sun is setting, grap a glass of wine(juice, soda or whatever), a blanket(lounge chairs), and your spouses hand. Go outside to sit and enjoy each others company as you watch the sunset. Yes, I encourage you to continue holding your spouses hand the whole time. To me this is "courting". If you are not in a relationship do this for yourself. When was the last time you "courted" you.

I surrender & trust
Guidance for today: Be an Activist & Commited.